i just had a talk with myself....
told myself it's all about 'focus.'
and i know it is.
i know it.
so.
okay.
i gotta refocus.
it's a choice, ya know?
it really really is.
something happened that made me sad.
i sat with it. felt it. really really felt it.
i could feel this chunk of sad inside.
that's okay.
sad's okay.
and it's not all of me.
just a piece sitting inside.
know it's there, and move on to the other.
okay, so i've been tryin'.
but i'm preoccupied. wanting things i'm not getting.
great.
those stinkin' needs again.
what about taking my life back??
grin.
okay.
i'm there.
i've been doin' it. but not quite with so much gusto.
this kinda popped a tiny little hole into the sails.
but then i thought.....this is my choice.
there's a gazillion fun projects goin' on with bone sighs
right now......
i want to focus on them.
i want to smile as i work on them.
i want to feel that excitement inside.
that's my choice, isn't it??
it's the focus thing.
why is it so much easier to focus on the sad?????
maybe it's not.
maybe that's just a dumb habit.
maybe i just have to focus so hard on those good
things that i totally forget the sad.
why not???
i can do it the other way around.
think it's prolly just a matter of exercising some
inner muscles......
i think i can do this.
i know i can do this.
if i can't, i might as well give up now.
grin.
and i ain't doin' that.
nope.
i've got a world to conquer, kids to bother,
and a soul that needs to go dance a bit......
think i'll go flex my dancin' muscles.
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