happy anniversary!

sometimes he amazes me with how much he knows me.
sometimes he amazes me with how clueless he is.
what a combination.
just when i think he doesn't understand a thing,
he slides right in there with such deep understanding
that he points out things i didn't even know.

i've grown.
years ago if i was having a day like yesterday, i
would have avoided him. 'isolated' is the term i
use. 'hid' is the term he uses.

but not now. i picked up the phone, told him a little
bit of what was goin' on.
and he slid in that awareness that stuns me.

later, after telling him of my going to some of my
women friends, he commented that sometimes he just
doesn't know how to help and that an estrogen IV seems
to be what i need.

i smile as i type this.

we have come so far.
we are both learning how to trust and love.

neither one of us was very good at it when we started.
bruised and tattered from our pasts, we became best
friends. encouraging each other and sharing our
strengths with each other, and stumbling a whole lot
along the way. could something beyond friendship last
between us? or would we lose all we have in that
attempt? we held our breath and jumped.

seven years later, we see that yes, it can be more,
yes it can last and it can grow.
and we've only just begun figuring out how much more
it really can be.

he teaches me to love like no other.
may i not miss this chance to really learn love.


if i can love you in my heart,
can i carry it down to my bones?
will my cells fill with it,
carrying it past any physical realm?
will i become love when i learn
to really love you?


happy anniversary, bob........