Tuesday, October 4, 2011

a goofy messenger

i turned onto my street not sure i'd even make it up to the corner,
just wasn't in a 'grab the morning' mood.

but before i turned the next corner, i felt myself walking so fast
and i thought 'man, i could just walk to texas.'

why texas, i don't know. it was far away,  i guess.
i felt like i couldn't walk far enough or fast enough.

i walked my heart out.
and my thoughts kept right up with my feet.

i wondered how people who didn't take walks stayed sane.

i walked out every negative thought inside of me.
and man, there were a lot.
i was surprised.

i asked every question inside of me.
and man, there were a lot.
i wasn't surprised.

had no answers. but wasn't expecting any.
just wanted to walk it all out of me.

i was so lost in thought that when a car pulled up at a stop sign near where i was walking
and honked, i jumped pretty good.
and then laughed and waved.

it was a white guy about my age in this goofy knit hat pulled down
over his head in a tiny little beat up car. he looked like such a character.
i woulda been nervous except he fit in the neighborhood so well and
i knew he was a neighbor somewhere. i've seen him in that car many times.
i grinned. i certainly have an interesting neighborhood.

he rolled down his window and laughed and said he was sorry about the honk.
and then he hollered out 'it's good to see you walking! i haven't seen you
in awhile.'

and he said it with the warmest voice. like he really meant it.

i smiled, thanked him and kept goin'.

but i was thinking about it as i walked away.

his voice was so warm.

it was warm.
like he cared.

what is with this? i wondered.
it really seems like people care about my walking.
and they don't know me at all.

so, okay, it can't be about me. cause they don't know me.
it's got to be something like it makes it feel like a neighborhood,
or it makes it feel like a day when everything is as it should be.
i have no idea....

except this thought ran thru me.....
we have no idea - none - of how our presence in the world touches others.
simply by taking a walk in the mornings.
what about when we're deliberately present for others?

there's so much swirling around us that we don't even know about.

and somehow, i think that's the message i needed to get this morning.

as i pulled my shoes off when i got home, my toes were tired.
'guess i couldn't have made it to texas,' i thought.
guess i didn't need to. cause right here, in my own neighborhood,
some kooky white guy in a goofy hat and a clunky car reminded me
this morning that my presence matters. and that we're all connected.
even when we don't know it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Love this! Yes, we rarely know you much we affect the lives of others, many of whom we don't even know. I frequently see an elderly woman with a cane who walks back and forth in front of her house. Her tenacity helps me to feel hopeful.
You, too, give me hope, Ter.
Keep posting.
Denise