Monday, June 30, 2014

still workin'....

a friend got me thinking the other day.
always a good thing for a friend to do.

he and i sorta bonded over the theme of darkness and light.
so it seems natural that our conversation would head to our shadow sides after awhile.

if you're not familiar with a shadow side, you can google it.
it's a term jung came up with and then a whole lotta people ran with.
or maybe he took it from freud and changed it around a bit.
not sure.
just saw a lot of different angles to it as i read about it all.

i even saw the 'golden shadow' which i liked a lot.

so i read all this stuff and tried to figure out what parts of me made up my shadow.

i came up with some stuff.
not done yet.
but one of the things i came up with was something i know darn well i carry around
every single day and try to suppress. so i already knew about it. this just gave me
a new way to look at it. a new angle.

and once i had this new angle, darn it all if i couldn't stop seeing how much this
piece of shadow played with me and my life.

i spose seeing it and really watching it is a good start.
and i know it's a step further into the awareness i already had.
i know that's good too.
but when i felt it kinda whip me around inside this last time,
i wanted to do more than just see it.
i wanted to work with it so it'd stop with the whole flinging me and my insides
all over the place.
and no, i have no plan.
no idea on what to do.

so i went and looked around again. and i found this quote -
and reading this actually made me excited.
because it reminds me this isn't easy stuff to figure out,
but it's worth it.

i get discouraged sometimes.
think i should have something down more than i do.
not be so controlled by things way down deep.
and then i remember - that's how we work.
that's what makes us human.
we stumble, we goof, we have no idea why, if we're lucky we start to see the pattern,
we begin to understand ourselves, we get more confused, find some compassion,
stumble again, and get right back up and try again. all the while, if we're lucky, we're
making progress that's so slow we barely notice. but there are days we do notice.
there are days we do see the progress. and we hold that and keep goin.

cause it's worth it.

this quote reminded me of that, and held me by the shoulders, looked me in the eye,
and told me to keep at it...

If you imagine someone who is brave enough to withdraw all his projections, then you get an individual who is conscious of a pretty thick shadow. Such a man has saddled himself with new problems and conflicts. He has become a serious problem to himself, as he is now unable to say that they do this or that, they are wrong, and they must be fought against… Such a man knows that whatever is wrong in the world is in himself, and if he only learns to deal with his own shadow he has done something real for the world. He has succeeded in shouldering at least an infinitesimal part of the gigantic, unsolved social problems of our day.
“Psychology and Religion” (1938). In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. P.140


Anonymous said...

I know I have said that i am doing a lot of shadow work, ~laughing~ and it isn't easy.. Nor is it suppose to be. The big one that I just rolled back, is the fact that a great many people hide in the shadow, because we don't often see each others shadow side.
I mean really? I have a hard enough time being real and honest and looking at my shadow side, I rarely have the gumption to look at some one else's.
I guess it's part of perception, like loving the broken bits, and seeing what we do with them. I love the quote.. Is it Mr. nepo?

terri st. cloud said...

hey, ms. anonymous,
thanks for the comment. this stuff can tire ya out! :) no it's not nepo, or at least i don't think it is. that's funny.i put where the quote came from, but they don't have the author there, do they? i didn't even realize that....

Diane in AR said...

This one is deep and one I'll read again and again. . .it's all part of us being works in progress - learning each and every day. . .thanks ter for the though-provoking blog. . .

margy said...

Thanks again Terri for your thoughts that help my thoughts. I'll definitely check out the 'shadow sides'. You are like a fix for my soul every morning. My mind has been so full of anger, fear, but yet aliveness with some huge projects for some family members - but hopefully this morning the worst is over and I can get back to the mind healing and calming and self caring and self-loving.So thanks again for being you and please know that you are VERY important to my soul and I suspect to many others also.

terri st. cloud said...

thanks, diane. i'll prolly be rambling about it awhile now! :) and margy, i'm sure the anger and fear don't feel so great....but liked the 'aliveness' part. how interesting, huh? and thanks for the 'soul fix' part. you are very kind. :)

terri st. cloud said...

just googled the quote! it was JUNG who said that! how cool is that?! of course it was......