in spirit...

for many different reasons that i'm aware of,
and prolly a few i'm not aware of,
i've been a bit on the beat side lately.
just tired and non-energetic.

it's at those times i see how truly energetic my life is.
when that zip is gone, wow......do i notice.

today i was frustrated with it.
need to get so much done and it's just not happening.

so i decided to work with it.

and i see what an incredible balance it is to do that.

i did both -
respect the fatigue and rest.
and then i got up and 'did the opposite.'

i love the 'opposite' idea.

i remember reading ages ago that if you're feeling depressed,
instead of just layin' around, you gotta do the opposite of what you feel like.
and i think the example in the book included all kinds of lethargy,
not just depression. get up and take yourself out for a walk when you
don't feel like it. move around, dance to music, do things you don't feel like.
force yourself.

and i realize - sometimes we're tired because we're tired!
and that needs to be respected.

and then sometimes it needs to have the ol' opposites worked on it.

so today, i tried to do both.
and both felt really good.

but my gosh, it really is hard to move when you don't feel like it.

i think of those who deal with severe depression.
it's gotta be one almighty task to try to get moving.
i'm just tired and it really took some effort.
it seems just about impossible if it was worse than that.

but i'm betting it matters a ton.

so i decided i was going to keep at this for as long as it takes
to get my energy back. and i kinda wanted to do it with those who
are depressed in mind. i wanted to hold them in my heart and
keep pluggin' away and maybe whisper out to them thru the universe -
'you're not alone. i'm thinking of you.'