i'm not sure how it happened....
i think a bunch of things collided bam bam bam
right in a row. and i think they blew something
to smithereens!
i don't remember that ever happening to me before.
i'm fascinated and grateful.
i saw the players in my life differently.
i saw me totally differently.
something popped.
i've been hangin' on....frustrated...tired...
determined....scared....overwhelmed....
um. excuse me, terri....all those should be signs
that you're head (heart??) isn't in the right place...
and they weren't. and i saw them. but i couldn't seem
to shift things.
well, the universe shifted it for me.
and i think the way i saw it was thru my 'needs'.....
i've decided i'm going to really look at my needs.
determine what they are. are they something i'm really
not getting, or something i'm just not seeing i'm getting?
are they something i can fill myself? something i can get
from various sources?
as i started to sort thru all that, i saw how much of my
life i've just let go of. i saw how i've just sat back
and given it away....
am i being a victim?
ah! isn't THAT a good one?!
with work...i've been lost. not sure where to go. worried
about the finances....
when i started it was a lot worse, and yet i had the drive to
just keep goin'. my drive was just about disappeared......
until now.
it was back full force yesterday.
i'm gonna make it what i want it. that's mine. up to me.
and i can feel the energy back like it was....
with someone i've been avoiding in my life........i've decided
to go visit...my partner asked me last nite what the goal was
in the vist......my answer?
'because i can.'
i want to grab MY life and make it MINE.
no.....no.......not "want to".......I AM grabbing my life.
it IS mine again.
and that question from the other day (see 'are you ready' post
below!)...."are you ready?"
it really bugged me that i wasn't.
guess what?!
I AM!
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