man, did i just take one heck of a walk!
i went miles inside myself....not necessarily
deep...nope. just all around and scattered.
i started out tryin' to figure out a problem,
but ended up throwin' it to the wind...
i just want to have a happy day. and then i
remembered something someone said to me recently.
he had met me when i was at my lowest. he saw someone
completely different then. and he commented on it.
he mentioned the big smile and sparkley eyes and thought
they were a new thing.
nah.
they just weren't there when i met him cause i was
just tryin' to survive then.
but they've been with me most of my life...actually, all
of my life except for that one point.
BUT! there are times those things just kinda hide.
and the sad takes over.
well.....i decided i wanted them today! i wanted to feel
good about things. wasn't sure i could do that with
EVERYTHING today...actually, pretty sure i couldn't...
but knew i could in some places.
and so i went there!
business! i can have a big smile in business! okay.
so what am i gonna do business-wise today....and i started
gettin' into it.
before i could get to the big smile in mothering, i bumped
into my elderly neighbor. we chatted for awhile and there
was a lotta laughin' goin' on between us. ahhhhh, i thought...
here it is. more smilin'.
there's some stuff goin' on today that i feel is difficult.
but ya know what? i really don't care. it will take care of
itself. and i'm thinking if i can feel happy today that may
just really help the other stuff out a lot...
so, that's my big deep goal for today...
to have a big smile and let my eyes sparkle a bit!
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