sittin' on the ballroom floor.....

what if you find yourself in a dysfunctional dance
and you don't want to do the dance anymore?
what if you think you're doin' what you can to
get out of the dance, and your dance partner tells
you that's part of the dance too??? that you've
done this step before??!!

oh.my.gosh.

i wish i had someone who could dive into my head
and figure it all out for me!!!

i guess that's my deal isn't it?

it feels impossible to figure out.
it feels impossible to resolve.

tada!
i'm thinking what we have here is a learning
experience!
groan.

if i can share it, i will.......
at the moment, i'm stable, coherent, and very
confused. (can you be coherent and confused?
yeah, i think you can....)

i figure eveything but the confusion will change....

i'll be hashin' thru this for a bit...
if i come up with any ponderings, i'll try to put
them out there....

someone i trust very much said to me real gently...
'ask for some answers.' i hate it when she does that.

so.....on my way home from the grocery store, i looked
up at the beautiful evening sky....and i asked.

asking makes me nervous.
because i get answers.
and they can be pretty exhausting sometimes....

but i'm in for the ride.

i want to be healthy.
not dysfunctional.
i want my dances to be good ones....

and so.......i will sit down in the middle of the
ballroom floor and see if i can figure it out....