Wednesday, May 13, 2009

finding a loving way....

ya know....
darn if every stinking thing isn't about love.

i sit here thinking about my neighborhood and
progress and greed and all that stuff and
tryin' to sort thru acceptance and such....

when i turn to deal with something i didn't
know how to deal with.

a situation has come up that i thought required
me to make a decision. and i was stumped.
i wanted it to be healthy and loving, but i just
wasn't sure which way was healthy and loving.
sometimes it's not real clear to me.

and then it occurred to me.
i don't need to make a decision.
HE does.

so i wrote him.
and told him EXACTLY what was running thru
my mind.
told him the different takes on the situation
i had, the different voices giving different
opinions runnin' thru my brain. the weaknesses
i had in the situation.
and then i laid it at his feet.

i didn't try to read his mind, judge his life,
guess his motives....

i just laid it all out there.

you take this.
and tell me what you want to do with it.

and i'll accept that and go from there.

and THAT felt the most loving to me.
and THAT felt the most honest to me.

sometimes i wonder if it's all as easy as
just being honest and straight with someone.

go figure.

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