the same goals....

here's the thought.
it seems so incredibly basic.
and yet, i feel like it's a life changer
for me.

if you share the same goal with someone,
then when there's some kind of conflict/
obstacle to face....there's absolutely
no reason for it to be threatening.
you'll both want an outcome that will
support the main goal.

okay.
this sounds like a no brainer and where
have you been, ter, thing.

but i JUST figured this out with my guy
and i think i can use this with other
relationships.

i think what's the nugget of gold in
it is the belief you have in the relationship.

if you really believe the goal is to love
each other (and again, this can be friends, kids,
whatever)....then why not just readily sit down
and say 'hey, we gotta bump here we gotta smooth!"

i tend to get tense....
hurt...
defensive....
suspicious....
all that junk.

but if you believe the goal, you don't need
that stuff. you just can go work it out.

so here's the kicker...
do you believe you share the same goal???

ta da!
to me, that was priceless.
with my guy, it's taken a long time to really
believe that.....to really really really believe
it.

but...
big silly grin here.....
i do.
and i do with everyone i'm really really close
to.

even bigger sillier grin.
this just tickles.