release

i have these home made 'angel cards' here.
they're just little tiny cards with one word
on each card. i have them in a bowl and you
pick one for your word for the day.

i have this great story about when i was
just buds with my guy. and how i was struggling
with feelings for him. feelings i so didn't want.
i laugh now remembering it all.

i picked angel cards over and over one week,
the week that it had all come to a peak for me
and it was driving me crazy.
...i picked the word 'release' over and over.
there's a lotta cards to pick from....
so that kinda caught my attention.
actually, it totally caught my attention.
it didn't really seem possible that could be
happening. what are the odds?
it definitely seemed like i'd better pay
attention.

i worked on the release stuff.
and i finally felt like i did it.
i finally released.

and that's when it happened.
it all fell together.
and we decided to try to do the couple thing.
it's a long weird story. but one of my favorites.

we've been floundering a bit lately in trying to
make things work smoothly for us in the weird set
up that we've got. there's a lot of logistics to
juggle and it can make it hard sometimes.

again, i've been struggling with my feelings about
it all.

this morning, instead of angel cards, i picked up
a deck of cards a friend gave me. they're called
'angelic messenger cards.'

and guess what i got?

yep.

release.

i fell back in my chair and laughed.

you're kiddin.

release.

you gotta be kiddin'.

okay.

i think that's the ticket.

and that's where i'll aim for.....

again.