Wednesday, February 24, 2010

asking questions

'you okay?' i asked him.
'you seem quiet. and you seemed quiet the
other day too.'

he handed me the boxes. i dropped them on
my studio floor.

'there's more out there,' he said.

'i'll come and help,' i offered.

'oh no, it's too slippery out here.'

'ah, i got my wellies! these polka dotted
wellies can handle anything. you need some,'
i told him as i slipped them on.
'they'd take that quiet mood and perk you right on up.'

and so we walked out front to his truck.

'seriously, you doin' alright?'

he said yeah.

'you just don't want to share,' i joked with
him. 'no problem. but if you need a cup of
tea, you know i always have one for you.'

we stood there jokin' a bit. i tried to be
light and make him smile.

we dropped the rest of the stuff on my front
porch and i walked him back to the truck.
told him a goofy story. he laughed. touched
me lightly and said i always made his day
brighter.

we said goodbye. i turned back towards
my studio. he hollered after me 'i really
am okay.'

'good' i hollered back. 'good.'

i walked back around to my studio....
thinking.

i wasn't sure how to ask him.
i know something's bothering him.
but i'm just a customer he drops boxes off to.
and i want to respect his privacy.
tried to open the door. he knows i care.

but......still.......

last nite i was thinking about questions.
and asking people questions.
i realized that WHICH questions you ask make
a complete difference in what kinda answers
you get.

there's an art to the questions.

i don't think i consciously have given that
much thought before. i know i do some stuff
intuitively. but i want to give this some
thought.

cause i think that if you can figure the art of
questions out, you can really really show people
that you care, that you're interested and that
they matter. and those moments happen all day.
i want to grab them. and really really make the
most of them.

i want to refine my art of questioning.

ahhhhhhhhh this could be good!

2 comments:

Camille Olivia ~ said...

ter, this is fantastic. and it's something that's been coming up a lot for me lately. asking the right questions...not just asking OTHERS but asking ourselves. surely does make a huge difference in the answers we get back. thanks for this.

Pamela Jones said...

So very true that what we ask or how we ask it can either encourage a response or shut it down. Terri, your compassion just overflows.

<3 Pam