Tuesday, June 15, 2010

guidance vs. control

was thinking about 'guidance' vs 'control'
this morning.

the easiest place to start thinking about that
for me is with parenting.

i believe it's part of a parent's job to guide
their kids. and sometimes the guidance is control.
but if you work with it all along and really
respect the kid, then it truly can turn into
gentle guidance as they get older. i think it's
a big dance all the way thru, with control being
more part of it when they're tiny and no part of
it when they're grown.

i think it's really sad when parents get lost in
complete control, or no control at all...and
guidance isn't ever even addressed or understood.
it's such a huge concept that if overlooked changes
everything. and i believe it's overlooked often.

as i was thinking about this, i brought my thoughts
to adults. my first thought was you can't guide
an adult. they've pretty much got their minds made
up.

but i don't think that's true. i look to my friends
for guidance. i will go to them when i think they
can see something more clearly than i can. i check
in to see what they're observing, what their thoughts
are. i look for their guidance.

but there's no way they can control. then i'd back
right away. would run the other way.

i actually look for the one, and run from the other.

i guess that's human nature. even when we're kids.
we may submit to the control....for a bit.....or
maybe forever....but it takes such a toll.

funny.

there so has to be balance, doesn't there?
and where there's no balance, it's so darn obvious.

there's another class we need in school:
guidance vs. control 101.

and yeah, i think we need it in school......cause
it's the rare home that teaches these things.

1 comment:

AlmightyHeidi said...

Does that mean I cannot taser my kids anymore when they talk back?? :) He he