me and the worms...

awhile back i wrote a blog about worms.
i had an insight while tossing worms back into
the wet grass where they needed to be.

bottom line was something like - what if we
knew when we were being tossed somewhere
that it was good for us???

i've been tossed somewhere for about a month
now.

for this reason or that, my partner's been
pretty absent. and i've missed him a lot.
and i've been frustrated and many things over
that missing him.

there's been a whole lotta life happening around
and in me. and i really really wanted him nearby
to share it with him.

more than once, i've pulled it together, gotten
a grip, breathed in a second wind, and tried yet
again to make the connection and share.

each time was an utter failure.
enough times that it's actually uncanny if you
sit back and look at it.

driving over to meet him yesterday, knowing again,
that it wasn't time to tell him the things that
were goin' on......it occurred to me.

maybe it's been awesome good i've been solo lately.

maybe it's helped me a ton!

and i got to thinking about it.

i have done some pretty intense inner work this past
month. and i feel like i'm just beginning. like i'm
hitting something big inside. and that i have stuff
that i'm touching that needs to be touched. and i feel
like i've kinda been pushed here.

like i wouldn't just wander in on my own......but
BECAUSE i've been on my own, i wandered there. i was
led. and being alone somehow opened me up to the leading.

i really think so.

so as i drove to meet up with that kooky partner of
mine........it occurred to me i've been one of those
worms....tossed into the wet grass where i could thrive.
picked up in the middle of my crawl elsewhere.....

and if i had known it would be good for me, i wouldn't
have kicked and screamed so much.

um......yeah.......
maybe i need to remember that......