the growth begins...

i gotta say this whole white tree visual is working for me.
i walked this morning and thought 'okay, what are you going
to do this week to grow your white tree?'

i thought about how i had done some good stuff with my guy
this weekend and now it was time i turned to me and did
some good stuff with me. on my relationship with me.

as i thought of it, i realized that i needed to 'unhook'
from my guy. i could actually visualize a hook that i got
snagged with a lot. that was part of our dance.

he's got some stuff goin' on that really takes a lot of
his energy. this isn't unusual for his life. and i tend to
get snagged into it all with him and there's this dance
that doesn't do me any good. i kinda get pulled into a
current i don't want to be in.

it's my doing. no one else's.
it's up to me to unhook.
no negative feelings of any kind.
he doesn't need me hooked in.
i don't want to be hooked in.
no one's asking for it.
it just happens.

it's part of the way i work when i'm not concentrating.
it's like a default place for me. it's where i land.
and it's not helpful.
it's without boundaries.

it's prolly part of the stuff that burned the white tree
in the first place. this landing in this spot and not
realizing i'm getting 'hooked' into other people's stuff.

hmmmmmmmmm........how cool is this?

i saw it as clear as day.
all you have to do is unhook and think about what grows
that tree of yours the best, ter.
and even just the act of 'unhooking' grows it!

it was that plain.
and for the moment, it's that easy.
i figure when i feel the pull to hook up to his craze,
i'll just visualize that white tree...and keep the hooks out
of it all.

it gives me somewhere to focus.
what's going to grow me right now?
what a great place to focus.

and as i've seen over and over again....the very act of
focusing on that will be where the growth begins.