Sunday, August 28, 2011

irene's visit

i decided i'm really not a hurricane kinda gal
nor an earthquake kinda gal.

i thought i liked dramatic weather....
think i've changed.

now i think of things like my roof, my house, my yard....
it takes a lot of the fun away.
but adds much to the gratitude pot when it's all over
and things are really okay.

i had a leak in my studio.
zakk happened to walk in as i started looking
around to make sure it was all okay.

'it's just a rain storm' he said as we both turned
to go out, sure everything was fine.

i looked down at some art that i had gotten back from
the printer. luckily it still had it's plastic wrapping
on it cause right there on top of it was a little puddle.

i pointed it out to zakk and we both looked at each other.
he immediately offered to go out and check it out.
my hero.

as zakk climbed up on the roof in the rain and yes the wind,
to check the leak out, the rest of us emptied out a good
part of the studio.

he came in with the drowned rat look and consulted with everyone
on how to fix the leak. did i mention he was my hero yesterday?
there were a whole lotta ideas on what to do and how to do it,
and yes, there were moments it felt like a darn sit-com to me.
zakk headed back up, the wind was pickin up, and that's
when i was really thinking i didn't like hurricanes.

i have to admit tho...that there's some excitement in being on
the roof like that. i've been out workin' on my house in a storm
before, and there is some kinda spark to that.

and it wasn't with the big winds yet. so we were still okay.
zakk fixed us up right and all settled back in.

the winds were pickin' up and you could hear them whistlin'
outside. i was gettin' worried about the trees now.

we lost power and we all gathered from our different spots
in the house to the living room. candles were lit and we
settled in to watch the storm outside.

it was getting late. it was dark. and the guys had finally
settled in from losing the ability to goof with all the
electronic gadgets. i curled in close to bob and just
listened to everyone talking as i watched this one big tree
outside dancing and dancing with the sky.

with all the distractions gone, and the quiet in the house,
and the late hour, and my own stillness just watching things,
i saw something that i didn't know what to do with.

i just lay there listening to the guys talk...
i realized the guys know so many things. all of them. they're
so smart. and bob, well, he knows more than i can ever imagine
even knowing. i didn't know anything about anything they were
talking about.

i didn't even know what to do with what i was seeing.
this isnt a cry for responses of 'oh, terri, you know lots of things.'
this is a sharing of this feeling of 'wow......look what i saw in
the middle of the storm.'

it isn't as bad as it sounds.
while unsettling, it was also very humbling in a really good way.
and i wondered what it was i wanted to learn about, what it was
i cared about, and what it was i was gonna do about it.

i want to know more things than i know.
i saw that last nite.
but if i really mean it, i have to pick and choose.
and what will i pick and choose?
and...and...and.....here's the part that i really have to pay
attention to.....

it means i have to learn to look at things in a different way.
doesn't mean i change how i look at things - it means i ADD to
the way i already work.

i watched the tree dance outside my window.
there's so much to see in so many ways.
i want to expand my seeing.

this all came about in the middle of a power outage.
just listening to those guys of mine talking.

you certainly can get gifts in the oddest places at the oddest times.
that was irene's gift to me last nite.




3 comments:

AkasaWolfSong said...

What an awesome gift...and why do you have to choose? Just take each thing as it comes and learn it and maybe the rest will come when they are supposed to too?

I don't know...just thinkin' out loud Ter. :)

Happy you all are safe and sound!
xoxo

terri st. cloud said...

thanks, woman. i like that! :)

Merry ME said...

Good to know you are all right. There's is something very comforting about having a son in the house that doesn't mind crawling up on the roof in a raging storm.