Tuesday, August 30, 2011

still dancing

i've claimed my life back,
and i'm serious about that.
i'm workin' hard on that.

i've mentioned the last two weeks have been hard,
but the part that needs to be noticed about that
is there were times i felt on the brink of insanity.


i think there are times when i just don't know what
to do with the emotions i feel...and i truly do feel
like i'm goin' outta my mind.

so, okay, two weeks of that and then poof! you just decide
you're coming back into it all, not running anymore, and
done with the insanity.

that's nice.
real nice.
good luck with that, ter.

so while i was doin' a great job on my own,
two different times during the day yesterday, two different
people i care about went ahead and messed with my balance.

but i'm really really serious about this claiming my life back.
so both times i had to sit myself down, remind myself that i
love both these people, and that people do these kinda things.

people hurt you, disappoint you, and drive you bananas.

that's what people do.

they also love you, inspire you, and make you happy.


i gotta say, i woulda been okay being a hermit on an island last nite.

but here's the point...
i didn't go insane, i didn't even fall out of my 'this is my life
and i'm gonna grab it' mood.
i can still feel the stars inside of me.
AND! i whispered to the morning this morning that it was mine
and i wanted to enjoy all of it today.

grabbing life i guess means grabbing all of it.
and letting the hurts and disappointments and frustrations be there.
cause they always will be.

they're my hurts and disappointments and what i do with them is up
to me. what i do with it all is up to me.....

still dancing over here......still dancing.....

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