starting again

there was life happening around me that created a ton of emotions in me.
'i just need some air,' i thought.

the practical part of me stepped up, told myself to get done what i had to do,
THEN go get the air. and so i did. and by the time i was ready for a nice
long walk, so was josh.

we don't usually snack when we walk, but it was one of those days.
as i ran out the door to go meet him, i grabbed some crackers, some
chocolate my girlfriend had just dropped off, and some 'essence of
cucumber' water. (yeah, really.)

josh's eyes lit up with delight over the snacks. 'it's a mobile picnic!' he exclaimed.

there's just something about my sons that can be so soothing for me.
and josh speaks my language which helps a ton.
when i said how much i needed this walk, he said he needed one too.

it is so helpful when someone jumps on in and joins in whole heartedly with you.

we talked a little about my stuff. but the point was to get some air and
get centered. i really didn't want to hash thru all the churning. and it was
when we got goin' talkin' about our businesses and what we wanted out
of them that i felt better.

we walked and talked for an hour and a half.
i couldn't believe it when i got back in my car. it felt like 15 minutes.

i came home to noah making a delicious lunch for all of us, and zakk
workin' his tail off to finish stuff up for bone sighs. i was totally grateful
for them!

i felt so much better. but it WAS one of those days.
it didn't take long for me to be back in the upset mode.
i quit even trying to have a normal day.
i decided to just hang out.

i ended up just soakin' up the energy in this house, and of my sons.
and i so needed it.

i felt seen and cared about by them.
and right then i totally needed that.

i realized how good we all were at giving that to each other.
that's something my sons and i step up and do for each other when one's struggling.

i thought about that.

and i thought about what an important gift that is to give.
how it changes everything.

today's another day!
and there's much good to concentrate on!
and that's where i'll be putting my thoughts today.....
on the good that centers me.