a thought...

i bumped into an interesting thought yesterday.
wanted to share....

talkin' with someone about money.
and her 'money issues' came up.

interestingly enough, it's not that she doesn't have enough.
it's that she has too much. and as she started mulling thru all that,
she felt very strongly that 'she wasn't worthy.'

now, i could see in a heartbeat that wasn't the case.
it was such an easy see for me that it caught my attention.
and i realized that perhaps what was goin' on was instead of the
issue being truly about money, it was more an issue that comes out
because she's struggling. so it looks like it's about money.
when really it's just always there and comes out in different ways,
in different forms.

is that a no brainer? does everyone else know this?

this was big news for me.

so, of course, i gasped and thought 'okay.......what's your own deal, ter??'

so i went right to my own money issues.
what are my feelings when i really wrestle with the money stuff?
what's way down deep?

and i came up with 'i'm not good enough.'

bam.

i have yet to come up with anything different than that.
that first thought still stands.
i believe that's the deal.

and yeah......that is SO one of my core issues.

so here i am over here thinking if i had a little more money, life would be
a whole lot easier.

well, yeah, there's the practical stuff and it would be.
but shoot, that's just practical stuff.

i'm good at juggling that.
it's the personal issues that drag me down into the muck and mire.
it's the personal issues that make life hard.
the practical come into play for sure.
i don't want to just throw those out like they don't matter.
of course they come into play.

but the real 'drag me down' stuff isn't the practical.
it's those darn personal issues.

so i'm thinking this is big news for me.
cause it's not that i have money issues - it's that i have issues!
ha!

laughin' here......
and if i can see them rise up when i struggle, i can see that these
are the things that surface that i need to work with.
instead of being a victim of them and drowning in their ick,
i can step aside and watch and say 'woe, look at that. there it is!'
and i don't have to be overwhelmed with it.

well......that's the theory at this point.
not sure how well i'll do with it.
but i thought it was a pretty good theory.

and i'm thinking - of course - this isn't just money issues.
it's ANY issue we struggle with. the stuff that brings us to our
knees and makes us feel like we're drowning sometimes.....
whatever that stuff is.........i'm thinking it's real possible the same
deal holds with that stuff.

and we don't have to drown.
all we have to do is see it and step aside and watch it and then
maybe we can work with it.

maybe it's all just a chance to grow and get strong and healthy.

and this thought has my eyes wide this morning.
and i have to laugh.....cause i'm thinking maybe everyone else on
the planet already knows this!! but it's a new one for me!