it's always been here,
this yard of mine.
i used to mow it when i had little kids.
i mowed with my youngest on my back.
i used a push mower that had no power but me.
i pushed and chatted to my son as he rode along on my shoulders.
i pushed and sweated, and mowed and mowed.
i look back at that and shake my head.
i certainly did what i needed to do.
but that's the thing...that's what i was doing.
i was mowing a yard that needed mowing.
and then my sons got big and took over the job.
i didn't do it again for years.
and i didn't miss it at all.
and now.....something's happening that i didn't expect.
my yard has become my therapy.
i don't mow because the yard needs mowing.
well.......i do.
but i don't.
i mow now to go out and have some space to think.
i rake to move the energy inside me and clear some gunk from my insides.
i clean my gutters to center myself.
i enter my yard and enter myself.
at the same time, the upkeep of the place -
the physical movement and also the taking care of the place-
that all seems to be a huge part of it. it seems to be what lets the magic in.
it's happening enough i've noticed.
enough now that i know to head out there when i need some clearing.
to head out when i need to think thru things.
to head out when i need to get let go and remember what it is to truly live.
as i walked across my yard last nite, in the dark,
i knew it was becoming a truly special place for me.
and here's the point of this whole thing -
it's always been there.
just waiting for me.
just waiting for me to notice.
just waiting for me to claim it.
i have a feeling there's a lotta things like that in life.
and i wanted to mention that.
what is it in your own life that is just waiting for you to claim it?
what else in my life is waiting for me?
i find that an exciting question.....
3 comments:
It is exciting - knowing it was always there - that special place that you KNEW was there, but that had more in store for you - love that your yard, your "empty" nest is truly embracing you, encouraging you to think, to feel, to reason, to be. . .who knows what's next!!! Joyful!!!
joyful! thanks, diane!
yep. looks like Diane hit the nail on the head. brava, miz ter! brava for all that you are!
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