Thursday, January 16, 2014

taken aback...

i don't think i've ever blogged about a tv show before.
i'm not much of a tv person.
don't even own one.

but i have joined in the downton abbey craze.
it's been kinda fun to join in on that.
i'm never in with the craze of a show, and even that has been fun.
i absolutely adore the grandmother in the series
and want to be like her when i'm old.

i watch the richness and wonder at it.
i watch the lifestyles and just try to imagine what it all would be like.
i love the big trees. they're SO big!
i can't exactly figure out why anyone would fall in love with the daughters...
but i like their clothes. i love to look at the styles.

it's a complete escape from real life for me,
and i've enjoyed it.

until now.
until the rape scene.

i didn't see it coming, didn't expect it, and was horrified by it.

i kept thinking of all the people i know who've experienced rape.
i was horrified for them if they were watching and didn't see it coming either.

i got on line to see if there was anything that could make me feel differently
than i did. i read where they said they were trying to tackle a difficult problem.

and i just couldn't buy it.

that doesn't feel right to me.
it feels to me that it was a 'great' plot twist for them.

i like to think that under any circumstances, that wouldn't fly with me.
that i would be upset by the cheapness of it.

but i absolutely know that because of what i do and the stories i hear
every day from women who've endured horrendous sexual abuse,
i can't be okay with what they did. that if portrayed, it needs to be more
than a darn plot twist. it's too heavy a topic, to serious an issue, to
raw a wound to just 'use.'

and that the show just ended for me.

sexual abuse of any kind is so complicated.
i totally totally want us to be talking about it.
i want people to come forth and tell their stories and find out that
they really aren't alone. i believe dialog will help. i want awareness to
be raised and raised and raised. i'm even okay with it being portrayed
on a tv show IF there's some real intent behind it. get the dialog rolling.
let's air out the wounds in a healthy way.

at the same time - i don't want it to be used cheaply.
which i feel it was.
someone said it so beautifully in a comment they left in the string of
comments on fb yesterday -
they talked of true healing happening in the context of light and love.

and what just happened saddened me and reminded me once again
that life is choices. and i need to fill my time with something better.

after writing this, a friend posted a link on the bone sigh arts facebook
page where i brought up this topic. i thought it was a wonderful
piece and wanted to share -

'rape on tv- more than just a plot twist'


diane in ar said...

Excellent blog - I don't watch the show, but I do agree that it sounds like it was just for shock and plot and to gain viewers. . .bottom line, all about greed. The link you provided also had an excellent writing about the recent rapes on TV programs. . . thank you for sharing - if people stop watching, maybe the movie/tv moguls will feel it in their pocket$ and cheap sensationalism would stop. . .I know, I'm a dreamer in the real world. . .but I always have hope.

terri st. cloud said...

thanks for your thoughts, diane...i've already got a plan to fill in that time slot. and it's way better for me anyway! :)