Wednesday, April 30, 2014

couldn't hurt

someone i love is stressed right now.
i've gotten to the age where i know that ain't so good.
so, inspired,  i've been workin' on my own stress.

granted, i'm in a good spot, and stress isn't high anyway.
but i figure i'll watch and think about it.
i want to try the awareness thing with this too and see where it gets me.

i headed up to the grocery store to buy some goodies for my sons.
as i'm headin' into line, i see a woman with one item walking by.
she's eyed this line, doesn't like it and has moved to the register down the way.

having walked by the other register already, i figured she'll be back.
she looked stressed, had one item, and this line looked easier.
i deliberately waited in putting my stuff up on the belt to keep a place for her open.

sure enough.
she came back.

i turned, smiled said 'i thought you'd be back. i saved you a place.'
and i moved outta the way so she could get in front of me.

i believe all she said was 'yeah' as she plopped her pink roll of bubble gum tape down.

seriously? she's gonna stand in line for that?
well, i thought, maybe she said 'thank you' and i missed it.
and maybe she's getting her son a goodie, like i am.
maybe he loves pink bubble gum tape and will be delighted.

things were going slowly, so i opened up a gardening magazine.
oh wow. talk about beautiful gardens out there. i browsed thru
amazed at the gorgeous colors of the flowers and thought about
what a beautiful world it was.

ms. pink tape roll started grumbling about no self serve registers being open.

i looked up. smiled. said they were prolly workin' on them.
was going to say 'but you would have missed me if you went to one of those.'
but i didn't push my luck.

went back to the magazine.

i watched ms. pink tape roll pay for her gum.
it was a less than friendly exchange.
okay, she really wasn't happy today.

off she went.
it was my turn.

i gave the cashier a warm hello thinking it might have been a trying morning.
i joked about the rain.
let's just say she didn't exude warmth.
she said this was a good time to put weed control on the yard as the rain
would soak it in. and she started complaining about dandelions.

i told her they took on a whole new look when you got into making dandelion
wine. soon you'd start wishing for bumper crops.

it didn't go over real well.

the man behind me put his stuff down without the little barrier thingie to
separate us. and yes, she rung up his bagels with my stuff and had to take
those off the tab. altho if i was thinking faster i woulda told her to leave them on.
that woulda been fun.

instead i apologized to her, saying i thought she saw and i should have said.

she grabbed the red barrier bar and dramatically put it between that man's
purchases and the woman behind him.
there was a huge sigh involved.

the man behind me seemed tense.

there was definitely a heavy air in that line.

and yeah, i walked out feeling like possibly the calmest person in the county,
but also realizing something else -

yeah, i wanna work on my stresses.
i want to remember what's important and what's not.
but i also want to learn how to just quietly send people around me light.
just wrap them in something calm, or just think good thoughts about them.
i want to learn to see their beauty under their stress and quietly, silently offer
that their way.

it seemed really important up there.
and i'm thinking everywhere.
i do it here and there.
but only in dramatic moments.
think maybe the ordinary moments need it a whole lot.

so i think i'll use my grocery trips to practice that.......
couldn't hurt.


linda marie said...

You have inspired me to join you!

diane in ar said...

Love this and smiled with you both with what you did and said and what you MIGHT/COULDA said - like you I try to spread the smiles, toss an unexpected compliment to a stranger, look for light. . .and try to put some into the everyday ordinary. . .

terri st. cloud said...

alright ladies.....let's spread some light! :)