birthday eve

it's my birthday eve as i type this.
figure i'd write this early as there's a good chance i'll be bouncing off the walls
during the day. i don't even have much of any big plans - just general excitement,
and chaotic joy. i figure that will keep me busy enough.

but tonite........i'm mellow.
and so deeply grateful and appreciative and happy.

it's been a packed day of fun and silliness -
and that's the day BEFORE my birthday.
i like getting in the mood early.

but now it's quiet.
i'm getting ready for bed.
i waited for it to cool down outside and i just opened the windows.
a beautiful nite breeze blew the curtains back towards me.
the nite sounds doin' their thang ever so gently.

it was kinda like a big gust of understanding blew over me too.
i understood how very blessed i am.
and what a gift the people in my life are to me.
and just having a life is.

i thought of a friend i had visualized wrapped in stars, and in my mind, i tucked another one next to her.
i thought of another friend who had dropped me the kindest note that nite, sharing her love with me.
of so many thoughtful people doin' thoughtful things right now, showing me they care.
i thought of my guys over at their place doin' their thing, so young and strong.
i thought of josh probably headed to his zumba class, so full of enthusiasm for living.
i thought of my guy and the look on his face earlier when he smiled at me, his eyes went so deep.
and i remembered the feeling from the morning when the tears ran down my face because
i realized if i could pick anything in the world to do for a living, it would be exactly what i do.

another breeze blew over me.

so gentle, so soft, so holy.

tomorrow i'll be bouncin' off the walls with joy -
deep joy - fueled by the gentle holy that surrounds me tonite.
i can't think of a more wonderful combination for a birthday.

toasting the universe and bowing with gratitude...