smilin'....

okay.......so it was the last of the dental work today.
and yes, i've posted about each visit cause i'm weird that way!

this is the stuff that i wanted done forever but haven't been able to afford.
and then this really incredible dentist comes along and makes it happen.
he hands me something that was just unreachable to me.

(anyone in the southern maryland area who needs a dentist, this guy rocks -)

i thought it was so cool that it was scheduled for today.
today's the first day of 'birthday month' - where i celebrate all month long,
and what better way to kick off the festivities?!

here's the thing tho, i think my nerves were a little shot to begin with.
my mouth still kinda sayin' 'hey! slow down..." from the other batch of dental
work last week.

and i think what gets to me more than anything is the weird funky grounded
teeth dust smell that you get thru this kinda stuff. i get a whiff of a funky smell,
and i'm sure i'll lose it.

so i closed my eyes and tried the visuals that i did last time to get thru.
they worked wonders for me before.
but nope.
not this time.

okay.
so relax, terri.
just feel the feelings.

and so i did.
i started concentrating on the different feelings i could feel.
the scraping or the squirting of the water, or that fun mouth vacuum thing.
i was doin' fine. gettin' lost in the feelings.

and then i felt what really did it -

the complete gentleness in this guy's hands.
they leaned against my face, warm and calm.
he couldn't have been any more gentle.
i tried to visualize the energy that came from this man.
and i felt it just comin' thru him into me.

i thought how wonderful it is that part of what this man is offering
is himself. and who he is can calm me down.

a long time ago, thru listening to a conversation between an awesome mechanic
and my sons, my eyes were opened to art in all its forms. i realized the people who
mastered their trades were truly offering their art.- and in that art were pieces of
those very people themselves.

i was reminded of that again today.
and i know when i smile now, this man's art is with me.