tension magic

i just found the artist we're going to feature
next month on our site.

her art is so similar to mine, it's scary.
we are definitely kindred spirits. maybe sisters
from a past life!

i got so excited about it and asked her if she'd
join us. i am really tickled about this.

she said that i must have learned what she learned
in life....that it feels good to love and give
and uplift because there's always enough to go around.

i smiled.

yeah.
kinda.
maybe.
sorta.

i have moments.
like with this, i'm really excited.

the guys laughed at me and said 'go ahead, promote
the competition. it's like shell saying go shop
at exxon.'

i laughed.

no it's not. it's sharing stuff.
and i know that.

thing is......
i also know that i haven't totally learned what
she credited me with.

there's still the moments of fear and holding on
too tight, and not wanting to give, wanting to hold
back.

people don't see that as much as it's quiet and
deep inside me....

i don't get it either.
once you've experienced the good from the other
way, why is it hard to hold that?? why is it so
easy to go to the tight way?

thick headed, i guess.
that's what i told her.

don't know.

seems like i have that a lot. the constant
tension of both those worlds....
the open and the tight...

hmmmmm....
maybe there's magic in that tension between
the two?!

ooooohhhhhhhh!
now i like that idea.
i like that idea a lot.

it makes my struggles turn magical.

yes.
i'm goin' with that theory.