lessons from the good things....

so i got a note to remind me that while i'm
making lists for myself, to make sure i list
the good stuff about me too.
(thank you for that)

well, i took that thought out with me on
my walk.

it occurred to me that maybe i can learn how
to work on the stuff that needs workin' on by
learning from what it is that i do well.

the very first reaction to that was nahhhh
cause whatever i do well, i do naturally. it
just comes to me, so i really don't get credit
for it if it's natural. and how discouraging
that will be when i really look at that because
it may mean i won't ever get the stuff i need
to work on right because it certainly isn't
natural. there will be no hope.

stupid grin here.
cause that was really stupid.

i didn't know that until i looked. and i'm so
glad i kept looking.

first thing was to find something i was good
at. try it. we're not as quick as we might be.

but i found something.
and i realized what work it was for me to be
good at it.

so i found a few more things.
and i couldn't believe it.
i work HARD at those things.

who knew????
i thought it was all second nature and effortless.
pphhlllllllllllllllllhhhhhhopppppppppppp.
(rasberry sound)

my gosh, noooooooooooooo.

so i looked at the work involved.
it included things like really looking and seeing.
pushing pushing pushing thru walls and roadblocks.
patience with myself and getting up over and over
again.

all that is involved in things that i thought were
natural to me.

wow!
so the fact that i need to do that with things i'm
no good at doesn't seem so daunting anymore.

i mean, it's daunting. it's all always daunting
cause it's so much work. but i see that i have done
it, can do it, and will do it.

ha~!

i can't believe it!
and i can't believe i didn't know.

and things i didn't think i should get any credit for...
well, ya know what? i should! i should give myself
some credit.

go figure.

how can one walk around and not know so many things???

baby step by baby step i'm learning......