lessons at the table

i came home feeling so tired i couldn't
believe it.

all i had done was sat there and talked.

no, that's not true.

i sat with total concentration for
three and a half hours. intense trying
for three and a half hours...

i saw stuff neither one of them saw
or will see.

i guess it's always like that with the third
person who's not directly involved.
they can see some stuff that the others can't
as easily.

so many communication misunderstandings.
too many, more than likely.

they aren't kiddin' about communication bein'
the key.

but ya know, i think for the first time i really
see how complicated that is.

behind good communication is more than just
sayin' the words the other person can hear in
a way they can hear....

it's the ability to know how they hear.
it's the wanting to know how they hear and process.
it's the strength to reach out when you're beat
in a way that's not natural for you, but the only
way they'll hear.

there's all this and plenty more.
the trust, respect and honesty we talked about
over and over again are mixed in there in so many
ways......

for everyone.

i have shaken my head before over how badly i
communicate with some people. 'we just communicate
really really badly.'

oh yeah, ter?

what exactly does that mean???

hmmmmmm........i think more than i thought it did.

lessons for me everywhere.

and them? we keep holding them close and trying....