Monday, August 3, 2009

turning towards the end....

i signed zakk up for his last year of school
this weekend. we home school, but we're with
a group so there's forms and fees and things.

his last year?! and really, we coulda finished
this past year. we elected to stretch it out
a bit.

so there we were at the kitchen table with
the math book this morning. and we started
talking about it all ending, him winding it

i get a little crazy with all of this. i always
thought all my kids would go to college.
and so far, it looks like none of them are going.
and that makes me wobble on the inside.

they all want to be entrepreneurs.
again, my heart wobbles.
they tell me i did it and they watched me do it.

my heart wobbles.
that's really cool and quite a compliment....
and um....totally scary.
it doesn't feel all that good to hear them say
i think "what have i done??"

and then i think of the whole 'follow your heart'
deal with bone sighs.
and i wobble around some more.

i gave zakk the college degree talk this morning.
how many more doors are open and all that.

i'll keep giving him those talks thru out the year.
not pushing. just honestly assessing each option.

and then watching him decide.

my boys are brilliant. and they can do and become
anything they want. i totally believe that.

and that's what i tell my wobbly heart over and
over again.

all thru the home schooling years i had to sit myself
down and tell myself to trust the boys. they had their
own timing and their own process.


i'm still telling myself that.

only.....they aren't boys any more, are they?

1 comment:

Merry ME said...

With the firm foundation you've given them your boys will go far in whatever direction they choose. Colleges will still be there if they should decide that's what they want sometime in the future.

I truly honor and admire your willingness and ability to complete what must have been an arduous task at times.

Three cheers for the teacher. Three cheers for the students.
You rock!