gettin' technical

there's some tough decision making goin'
on all around me.
thankfully, they aren't my decisions and
i'm just watching.

but the watching makes me think.

he said to me just yesterday 'if there was just
a rule of thumb, i'd be okay.'

no kidding.
me too.

so i'm watchin' people i care about tryin'
really hard to do the right thing in different
situations.

but there's no easy answer to what's right.

and in the situations i see, there's no counting
on the other person to help make things easier.
the other people are part of the problem.
their responses make things really tough.

i turn to the goal thing in my head again.

this much i know.
you can't count on someone else when making
your decisions. decisions are up to you.

you can't make decisions based on what you think
the other person will feel or do.

that can't be your reasons.

so what are your reasons?

i'm thinking there's two (at least) levels
of goals.

one's your goal in that situation.
the micro goal.

and another is your life goal. what you want
out of life and who you are.
the macro goal.

grin.
i'm gettin' technical.

i'm thinking you need both.

as i'm watchin', i'm seein' the goal in the
situation is limited.
it's necessary.
you need it.
but it's limited at times and at times you
gotta go to the bigger picture of what do
you want out of life and how does this get
you there? you need to see how the goals mix
and work with that.

goals aren't real easy to come up with.
but i think you gotta have 'em.

then you gotta learn how to work with them
clearly...which isn't so easy either.

so....say i have a life goal of opening my heart.
gorgeous.
wonderful.
but what does that mean you do in certain situations?
do you open to everyone?
um.
no.

so you gotta kinda see what exactly that means.
if you don't know exactly what that means it doesn't
do you a whole lotta good.

i think for me, sometimes i forget that i'm as big
a part of the equation as everyone else.

so if the goal is to open my heart and i don't
think it's wise to open my heart to a certain person,
then maybe the opening has to be to myself for making
that decision. i have to remember that i'm mixed in
this whole thing too. that the opening can be aimed
at myself.

i forget i'm part of the equation.
but if i can remember that, maybe that would help
me be more clear.

i don't know.

i'm thinking about my buds and their problems.
and i'm thinking that maybe they've forgotten that
part too.

not sure, but think it's possible.

maybe that's what they need to help see better.

maybe i'll remind them.
what are your micro and macro goals
and have you remembered to include yourself
in the equation?

they'll prolly just roll their eyes.
but what the heck....it's got me thinking anyway.