a gold nugget

got something i feel like is a gold nugget i want to
share! it's not mine, it came from bob. and i think it's
genius. now.....can i explain it?!

this came up this weekend as i was havin' a hard time
with some stuff between us. i gotta tell ya, i think we
are the team of teams because i was feelin' really raw
and i still trusted him enough to ask him if he thought
i was tryin' to create a 'disney movie' kinda thing with
our love....i was sincerely asking.
and he very gently said yeah.

i'm smilin' big here.
cause i was hurt, and i could hear him. and he could tell me.
and at the same time, he could step up and take his part
in the whole thing and see places he had to improve that
didn't have anything to do with a disney movie.

it was awesome. and here's the nugget he handed me....
right in the middle of my tears. and i so loved him when
he showed me this....

we all get images in our head over something. mine this
time is love. but it could be anything....think about what
you're struggling over...and find the image you're holding
that you feel it should be and that it's not....

so what i do, is i think okay love has to have this and this
and this and this. and every single thing i list is valuable
and is part of love. we're not doubting that part. that part
works. those are like pieces of a puzzle. and each piece,
the piece about honesty, the piece about respect, the piece
about acceptance, i take all those pieces and i make a picture
out of them. that's my image.

(side note here....i personally hold on real tight to the
image because of past hurts, and it makes that image really
srong inside me....and i'm thinking we all might do that kinda
thing.)

and then i've got an image and i want to make someone/something
fit that image. and it can't. cause it comes from me.
it's mine. no one else's.

if i get stuck on the image, and forget to look at the actual
pieces, then there's a very good chance i'll miss it when the
pieces get offered to me in a totally different kinda image.

i think this is brilliant.

here's the part to pay attention to....

you can't just say that okay, this is love even tho it doesn't
fit my image at all. that would get you into horrible places.
you have to know the pieces that make up what love is for you
are there. if they're there, but in a different pattern, you're
good. you'll grow. if they're not there......you don't have it.
and you need to know that.

i met a friend this weekend, and she had an entirely different
problem goin' on. something that was really bothering her with
other people in her life....and i sat straight up in my chair
to tell her the image thing.

cause i think she had it goin' too.

i'm thinking this works all over the place for all kindsa things.
it's been too hectic here to sit and think a lot more about it...
but i wonder? does it work for our view of ourselves too?

so much to think on.
i think it's gold.
and i think that guy of mine has brilliance inside him.