my mighty mouse heart

i had been thinking all day about this darn
open your heart stuff.
finally, the only way i could put it into
words was to say that while i've wanted to
do this for some time now, it's clear to me
that it's now much more than a 'hobby' and
it's more like a way of life.

okay.
so that's where my head is and i was still
tryin' to grasp that thought when i read
the following quote:

'a new philosophy, a way of life, is not
given for nothing. it has to be paid dearly
for and only acquired with much patience
and great effort.'

no kidding. there was the quote last nite
as i was curled in bed.
how amazing is that?

the quote itself was a zinger for me and
then when i saw it was from fyodor dostoyevsky
i grinned.

i used to read him all the time. i loved his
writing. he's from my other life. the life
where i was really playin' a game.

and now i want this real life......and there
he is reminding me of the two and reminding
me that it's gonna take some work.

this morning i took a bike ride with noah
and then hopped on the treadmill. i got to
thinking about how hard it is to get this
body into shape. they aren't kiddin' about it
bein' tough to lose weight after 40.

but i remembered the quote and thought about
how cool it would be to exercise my heart along
with my body. to work on opening it along with
my regular exercises.

and then it hit me......i'm always workin' on
opening it....but i don't really work on making
it strong. seemed like there must be something
about the ratio of strength to that of opening.
or is that a proportion??? you know what i mean.

at this point i was in my room doin' some stretches.
oh man. i don't stretch very well.
so then i started thinking about my body...and how
it can symbolize my heart.

the legs are pretty strong, upper strength is so
little it's crazy. i'm a weakling in the arms.
the middle is where my weight is and the stretching
just doesn't come easy at all.

so okay...my heart....it's got some pretty good
strong parts....then some parts where there isn't
much strength at all....there's the outta shape
flabby part, that would be the lazier areas of my
heart....and the stretching that doesn't come easy
but i still work at it.....

okay. okay. what if i really worked on my body.
and used it as a symbol of my heart. and what if i
worked on my heart while i worked on my body. what
if i did visuals of my big ol' heart flexing it's
muscles and pumpin' that sweaty glow from movin' it
a bit and feelin' good and healthy???

i got into this, did it a bit and pictured my heart
a little bit like mighty mouse.
didn't he kinda poof out his chest and flex his
muscles in the opening thing of his show???
that's what my heart was doin'.
my mighty mouse heart.

ahhhhhh.........i got excited about this. it could
bring new life into the exercise deal, and it sure
couldn't hurt to visualize my heart as getting
stronger and healthier every day.

this could be fun....