where the heck are your roots??

one of the things i've been thinking about is
where i want to live.

and no, i don't mean where in the country.
(altho, i think about that too!)

i mean where in my heart.

driving yesterday i was just really aware that there
are places that we 'dwell' in.

obvious places - negativity, optimism, gratitude, denial,
pettiness.....get the idea?

those kinda places.
and yes, i think we all dwell in all of them at times.

but it's where do i really want to have my roots?
where will my roots dwell??

i still haven't let go of the idea of being a 'living prayer.'
or 'being love.'

and i drove and thought about that.

i absolutely positively believe there is something to that.
that that is a place we can dwell in.

i have touched it.
touched moments of it.
i know it exists.

as i drove i thought about it.
why do you want to go 'there,' ter?

cause it's there, i thought.

i know it is.

and i really really want to shoot for it.
because it's sooooo much more than so many places
i dwell.

and yet.......how do you talk about this??
cause if you REALLY talk about it....there is NO there.

oh my.

it all just is.

yeah.
yeah.
i know.

but having a 'there' makes sense to me.
and gives me something to shoot for.

something that really made an impression on me is the idea
that we get so caught up in things that don't matter.
they just don't matter.

and that doing that - that right there is choosing to live in a land
of 'it really doesn't matter, but i'm gonna make it matter
anyway' land.

i want to work on that.
leave that place behind for good.
wouldn't that be awesome???

where are our roots of our hearts? where do we dwell???
how do we move those roots if we have to?
or how do we strengthen them???

i think it's all in what you really really really want.........