Sunday, November 14, 2010

thinking about tomorrow...

i sat having a salad with my guy and his son.
it was a new panera and it was cozy and warm.
we had just taken a chilly walk and it felt good
to snuggle in. where i sat, i could see the sunset
happening.

it was the town below the one we usually meet up in.
and it's the town my sons and i will be in tomorrow.
so i turned to his son and asked him if he'd heard
about the boy who got killed in the war from that town.

he'd heard.
and he added that he had friends that were close to the
boy.

and he heard what i did. that that group that spews hate
at funerals of guys who died in the service will be there.
i just even hate naming them. i don't want to give them
any power whatsoever.

we talked about it briefly. there will be a gathering of
people to stand and block the group as the family drives
by. he's gonna try to be there.

my sons and i will be there.
and from what i can tell, a whole lotta people will be there.

the topic changed and moved on.
and the sun kept setting.

the awareness that i was sitting in this new panera in this
kid's home town and that he'll never sit in it, hung around me.

when we pulled back into my driveway and i saw josh's car there,
the awareness of lost sons was still on my mind. it felt so
good to see that car.

when i walked up to the attic where they all were hangin' out
talkin' to each other, i held the scene.

tomorrow i will watch a family enter a funeral for their dead
19 year old son. and i will stand quietly and try to block
the view of completely insane hatred.

and i will mourn for the world.
and somehow i will try to hang on to the idea of being love.

3 comments:

Merry ME said...

When I was taking a journalism class a few years ago, there was a funeral for a hometown boy lost in Iraq. And the threat of "those" who would deny the family a quiet, ceremonial, and honorable funeral. When I got to the place where the funeral was to be, I was shocked at the numbers of people, vets on motorcycles, moms, kids, sisters, brothers, cops, firemen, everyday people who lined the streets to block out the evil. Thank God they did not show in our town on that day. I pray they will not show where you are. Yet if they do, I know they will not get past the people like you and your boys who stand in line to create a peaceful resting place for someone who gave his life for the country that lets people say what they want, even when what most of us would like to do is cram a big fat soapy washcloth in their mouths.

Constance said...

Terri,
Yes, it is the biggest challenge.

Hold to the focus that all that matters is your relationship with God. That you love God, that you bring your love to God, that His mirror then to you is one of loving integrity.

What anyone else does doesn't matter, isn't important.

Don't get distracted by the lower emotions/negative vibrations of people that seems to be such a large part of the planet.
Keep your focus on you and God, what is Light between He and You, divine soul to divine soul.

He has given you Life. As you cherish and respect YOUR life and your relationship with God, the love is ever present inside you.

Anyone else and what they do is irrelevant.

Rest in Peace, young man who died.

p.s. I hope this isn't too "woo-woo".

AkasaWolfSong said...

Mary and Annie have said it all except to say I send you strength and love ... as well as to the Family.

Thank You Young Man for living your truth and being the freedom we all take so lightly sometimes, so much so that you gave your life for it!