fifty years oh my!

ah,i finally made it to the actual birthday today!
fifty years ago i was born.

wow, that's weird.

i walked and thought about it.
if i could just remember where i was BEFORE these fifty years,
i'd be all set, i thought. i could figure everything out then.
i grinned.
yeah, why not?

and then i remembered really really really seriously tryin' to figure
that out when i was a kid. i remember laying there on my bed in the dark
thinking hard and thinking that if i could just remember...

i laughed out loud as i walked remembering that.
i pictured my room, my bed, the slanted wall that was over my head as
i slept.

i tried SO HARD to figure it out.

i laughed and thought.......okay, you haven't changed much.

i looked up at the clouds.
there was the perfect heaven kinda picture you see in paintings.
i gasped.
wow.

heaven.

and i grinned.

okay.
i have no idea about any of it.

but it's my birthday.
and i do know i'm gonna enjoy it today.
all of it.
the huge mix of life that it is.
all of it.

i looked up at heaven there in the clouds and gave a wink.

here's to life, i thought.

and turned back to my day.