so yesterday was completely hormonal.
ohmygosh up down up down up down all around.
i think it woulda been fairly even keeled if there wasn't
another soul i was dealing with yesterday.
but then again, maybe not....because if there wasn't another
soul around i'd prolly be down about that!
it was bound to be one of those days, i guess.
i'm hoping for much more even keeled today.
it started out frustrating.
and that's just not good.
so i walked.
wasn't going to.
but thought i'd walk the frustration out.
and do my daily visit with my neighbor.
i noticed i had to make myself tune in.
not my norm.
i'm usually tuned right in naturally.
but i did tune in and visited. and then headed
for my walk.
as i walked i thought of some of the things
and i kid you not 'buggin' me' was the phrase in my head.
when what should happen?
hands down at my sides, slightly swinging as i walked,
a bug flew right into one, buzzed around all along my fingers
and palm and then flew out.
never had a bug do that before.
i coudln't believe the timing.
or the symbolism.
that's what you gotta do with what's buggin' you.
let it zip thru your hands and out.
i am not kidding.
this is what went thru my head.
i paid attention to my hand. it could still feel where the
bug had hit, and some of the buzzy places. but i knew in
a few moments, there would be no trace/memory/feeling of it.
i thought of the things buggin' me.
i didn't want or need any of them.
i could let all of them go and not miss any of it.
and yet i wrap my hands around the bug and hold on.
ewwwwwww.........now there's a visual.
obviously, not what you want to do!
it's a hot morning.
i walked in my jeans.
i was hot.
whew, it's pretty warm already, i thought.
felt how hot my legs were.
then a breeze blew across my face. felt really good.
ohmygosh....is the morning talkin' to me or what today???
i thought about my life.
right now there's enough goin' on around me that doesn't
feel all that great. feels like hot legs in hot jeans.
and yet.......there's so much in my life that's the cool breeze.
i walked under the shade.
ahhhhhhh this feels so good.....and this shade......my life has
so much of this right now. good, comfortable, pleasant stuff.
but what am i doin'???
i'm hangin' in the heat with the bugs and holdin' on to the bugs
and concentratin' on the uncomfortable heat.
i walk down the street marvelin' at how the morning was teaching me.
and then i grinned.
some would say it's just a hot, buggy morning, ter.......
yeah, i thought.........and some would say it's just a hot, buggy life.
would they be right?
not by a long shot.
so go find your shade and rest in it, ter...
and let the bugs go fly somewhere else.
cause i'm not holding them today.