appreciating

i walked fast and furious this morning.
some mornings are just like that.

and i think all the columbus day thoughts got me thinking about my
homeschooling days. we didn't take columbus day off. we took stevie
ray vaughan's birthday off! seemed much better to me.

and so i got to remembering that. and it hit me.
i'm all done.
i homeschooled my three sons.

all three of them.
and i'm all done and they're really okay and they're bright and they're
competent, and i completed one heck of a task.

and i swear, i just about burst into tears on my walk.

i did it.

i did it.

and i thought of all the effort, all the thought. all the worry, all the hours and hours
and hours, all the learning alongside of them.

and i just couldn't believe i had done it.

i know, this is really a delayed reaction.
i know.
but there it was.
and truly, i just wanted to cry with relief.

and i thought about how we pulled it off.
and how tricky it got with the divorce, and then starting bone sighs.
and how i juggled trying to love them, teach them and survive.

and i felt good.
really good about it.

and then i realized that i don't stop much to appreciate the accomplishments.
i keep pushing forward.

and how it's important to stop and look.
see what you've done.
acknowledge the good stuff.....

what the heck good is it if you can't stop and look back and say
'oh yeah, that is so cool.'

there's always something to push forward with.
no matter what.
but stopping and appreciating the accomplishments matters.

and i forget way too much to do that.
this morning felt really really good.