eggin' me on...

so the big thought for me lately is the whole idea that  you can have a
relationship with life. that if you look at it that way, your interactions with
it change.

it's much more cosmic and beautiful a thought than that, but if you've
been reading the blogs, you  know already. so i'll leave it there for now.

so then mix in what i call my 'inner child.'
what exactly IS that???
if you don't relate to that term, or don't feel like you have one, what is it
i really mean?
i don't know, cause for me it so clearly is my inner child.
it's the part of me that's free, and joyful and loving and innocent and caring
and playful and impatient and yet patient beyond belief. the part of me
that can forgive in an instant and get up and jump two feet back in the game.

that part.

that part was awake and strong in me as i walked this morning.
and i realized that's the part that can really have a relationship with life.
and does.
that's the part that doesn't 'work' on the relationship.
that's the part that just lives it.

that's the part that dances with life and revels in it and yeah, gets
really sad at the sorrowful parts.  that's the part that's so real and so
free of constraints.

and i think somehow this new thought of mine and this inner child of mine
go hand in hand. that if i concentrate on her, and concentrate on life
being a relationship, that something opens up and i find things
i didn't know about.

i was reading clarissa last nite and she talked of the heart. and she talks
of singing. and she talks of the gods being called in and of 'crafting soul.'
she really shouldn't egg me on like this.

maybe this inner child of mine is 'heart.'
maybe that's exactly what it is.
and maybe this living life as a relationship is 'singing.'

and maybe that's what happens when i combine it all.....
the gods are called in, soul is crafted and my world expands.

maybe.

sounds awfully good to me.