needs

i stumbled on something last nite that just made me stop in my tracks.

i was reading about our needs. how we have the need for safety and
security and how early on that's, of course, met by others. and he talks
of that being our 'elementary level ingredient of our development.'
and goes on to say that in full maturity, it becomes our own inner resource
that fulfills our need for growth.

okay. good. cool. then he talks about our need for self actualization.
and how that requires being given the time, space and resources to become
who we are. ...'our higher needs include making full use of our gifts,
finding and fulfilling our calling, being loved and cherished just for ourselves,
and being in relationships that honor all of these.'

then he goes to say these get fulfilled by what he calls the 'five A's' -
attention, acceptance, appreciation, affection and allowing.

ohhhhh what a great list. first thing i do is go to my relationships and do
a check...am i offering the five a's? and THEN....how about with MYSELF?!

ah, right there's enough to think of for a life time...

but we're not done....

he goes onto describe the 'allowing' part of the list, and THIS is what
stopped me in my tracks -

1. we are free to show our feelings without being interrupted, punished
or ridiculed for them.

2. we have full permission and encouragement to declare and live in accord
with our own deepest needs, values and wishes.

3. our path is smoothed for us by caregivers who protect AND launch us
so we can make our own choices and move out and on when we are ready.

wow.
wouldn't you love to sit in an auditorium and ask how many people got that
as a child?
or maybe not.....maybe that would be sooo sad to see how few hands went up.

when i read that i just sat there kinda stunned.
and i thought about my past. and i thought about my now...and i thought about
how i need to pay attention to that now and really truly give this to myself.

sometimes there's nothing else you can do but give it to yourself......
and don't you think that's a pretty powerful thing to do?