in response to a love song that bothered me..

here's the thing...
I just heard a love song....
and the guy singing, who would be you in my head,
sang he'd die for me...

i don't want you to die for me.
i don't want anyone to die for me.

i want you to live for me.

i want you to live for me,
just like i want to live for you.

when i think of you in my life,
i want to be all i can be.

to make you proud of me, yes.
but also to make it so i can love you more -
more honestly, more deeply, more real.
just more.

that sounds so much better than dying for someone.
and yeah, i want that in return. i really really do.

i want you to live for me.

and i want you to see me.
i want you to see who i am and dance with who you see.

i want you to see me closely enough that you know
when gentleness is called for, and when your strong pushes
are needed.

i want you to see the fear that causes the struggles,
and to squeeze my hand and remind me that it's just fear,
it's not real, and we're okay.

and i want you to see those small victories of mine,
the ones that are bringing me closer to you and i want you
to rejoice with me in those steps forward.

and i want you to see how much i adore you.
how much i respect and like you.
and how much you matter to me.

and i want you to hold that and honor that and treasure that.

and i want to take all of this and reverse it and do it for you.
always.
when i'm secure and steady.
and when i'm not.

and somehow in there, maybe there is a dying for you.
a dying for me.
maybe what dies are the fears.
and maybe what lives is the love...