love

i noticed it yesterday.
i'm thinking it was after the fourth
'i love you' i shared with someone...
that i noticed it.
that sentence is part of my life.
in such a real sincere way that it stunned me.

when i was growing up, my family never said that
sentence.

ever.

i remember as a teen babysitting for one of
the kindest, gentlest families i ever met.
and 'i love you' was part of their every day
talk. and it wasn't quick and thoughtless...
it was sincere all the time.

i was so amazed.

i had never seen that before.

i was the first one to ever say it between my
parents and i. i told my dad i loved him for the
first time ever. i was in my early twenties.

he said 'thank you.' in response.

yeah.
laughin here over that one.
cause i can laugh over that now.

when i had my own family, that sentence was
important to me. and it became a part of my life.
and never in a casual way. it took too long
to come to it for that.

yesterday i realized that it was everywhere
thru out my life now.

and i thought about how far i've come.

i made a decision awhile ago.
i wanted a life of love.

wasn't sure i could have one.
but i wasn't gonna settle for less.

yesterday i saw it so clearly.....
i had one.

i have one now.

how awesome is that?!

i don't take that lightly.

i got what i wanted.

now.
to tend to it.
and keep it what i want.

that's the way i can pay back my gratitude.

feelin' pretty darn lucky.....