i don't remember ever just sittin' in this spot before.
it's a 'and there you have it' spot.
it's fascinating me.
neither good nor bad....it's just there.
there's one particular thread in the weaving of my
life that has taken the stuffing out of me for awhile
now....
i saw the stuffing get knocked out.
then i saw it get stuffed in so i could move about
and do what i needed.
but it was stuffed in funny.
so then there was the squirming cause the stuffing
was weird.
i've seen all those stages.....
the rearranging of the stuffing.
the strength coming back.
the gut punches messin' the stuffing up again.
the whole deal.
and now.
now.
i've come to this.....
just a complete standstill of looking at it all and
going.....'and there you have it.'
like there's nothing left i can do.
don't think i believe that.
cause there's always something you can do.
even if that something is leave it over there
and take what you learned and go forward.
but for the moment, i'm standing still and watching.
and don't feel any need to do anything.
it's an odd place for me.
but i'm kinda likin' it.
i'm always the one who has to take care of everything...
make everyone okay.....make things better....
today there isn't an ounce of that in me with this.
just a steppin' back and goin' 'yep. look at that.'
ya know......it's kinda neat.
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